A Love Story? I Don't Think So

Who in the hell is Cindy Margolis? I have no clue...but she has big boobs and a horde of 25 idiots all trying to date...sorry..."marry" her, which she says is a love story. Okay, really? If this is a love story, then I don't want one. I'm pretty sure this is the white trash version of the Bachelorette. Backstory: apparently she was married from the time she came out of the womb until her husband divorced her because she claims that she's never had to date before and doesn't know how. Okay, so since she doesn't "know" how to date, she turns to the internet to "solicit" men to seduce her. Wtf? That's not dating...that's called whoring around. She is 45 years old and her 25 options range in age from 18 (yes, I said 18) to 71. She claims they are "amazing." I highly doubt that. Some are cute, some are creepy, some are dorky, some are pathetic ~ most are meatheads, freaks, douche bags, milf-lovers, mamas boys, tools, ego maniacs, crazy psycho fans, delusionals, wusses, and pervs. I haven't seen one normal guy in the group, but half of them claim to be models. Yeah I don't think so. Okay, wait there is one nice guy who I'm assuming is going to eventually get his ass kicked by the Tupac impersonator. That is not a typo. TUPAC IMPERSONATOR. Yes. Clearly she has no standards, which creeps me out. And it should creep out most of the guys that are there, but they all seem to be so enamored by her and her boobs that I don't think anyone notices how wierd this is. Especially not the 18 yr old who claims he lost his best friend because he had sex with his mom. Ew.

So the idea is that she "dates" these guys (translation: hooks up with). There's not a lot of substance to this show ~ not like that's a shock. I think Cops has more depth. This chick is a freak ~ and it pisses me of just a little that she has these kids who are clearly on the backburner so her ego can be inflated. Mom of the Year she is not. Oh, the best part...the entire house is filled with giant blown up pictures of her in swimsuits.

So I love that the guys show up and immediately go straight to the bar and start getting hammered. Because there's nothing classier than a tool who's wasted. I'm not sure why she had to go to the internet to find these losers. I can find this motley crew at a bar on any given night. Next she tells the guys she has a love shack. Of course she does. She picks one guy out of these randoms to go to her love shack by giving them a piece of her wedding cake. This would be a HUGE red flag for any guy. And these guys are fighting each other trying to get the wedding cake. HELLO? ARE YOU GUYS PAYING ATTENTION??? If any one of these guys was dating this girl normally and not fighting 20 other guys for her attn, and she shows up in a wedding dress with a wedding cake, they couldn't run fast enough to get away from her. Seriously. But because these idiots are so hell bent on making sure they beat out all the other idiots there, they're willing to say and do anything.

My favorite part of the show: she said she feels like a slut after she takes a random to her love shack and hooks up with him. Honey, you shouldn't feel like a slut, you should just acknowledge that you are one.